The Sackbuts Bring a Knife to a Gunfight

by Chester Curlybush

November 29, 2023

NPL Results – Week 12!

Familiarity breeds contempt, so put me in the basement so I can finish a write-up. If you’re not a fan of America’s darling, well, then I had a marvelous time ruining everything. You’ve got no reason to be afraid. You’re on your own, kid. It’s the NPL Write-Up, Taylor Swift style!

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The Juggernauts Stun the Androids

by Benedict Undersnatch

November 24, 2023

NPL Results – Week 11!

Michael continues their ascension to the Prophet Division throne! Jerry emerges victorious in a hotly contested divisional battle against Cari! Axell finally corrects course! And the Evil Entities make easy work of their opponents in Priiiiiiime Tiiiiiiime!

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“This team is a bigger pain in the ass than my perineal abscess!”

by Skip Brainless

November 17, 2023

NPL Results – Week 10!

We return to the broadcast booth this week for the sounds of the NPL. Hear the local radio hosts’ most memorable calls for Week 10. It’s the NPL Write-up, broadcaster style!

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Love Is Like a Fart: If You Have to Force It, It’s Probably Crap

by Lauren Ipsum

November 9, 2023

NPL Results – Week 9!

It seems today that all you see is violence in movies and sex on TV. But where are those good old-fashioned values on which we used to rely? Lucky for the writers this week, there’s a Family Guy that can provide all the quotes we need to get this article posted! It’s the NPL Write-up, Peter Griffin style!

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The Wrecking Balls Knock Down Brent’s Walls

by Benedict Undersnatch

November 2, 2023

NPL Results – Week 8!

LeScoot snags their second victory of the year. The Braggadocios help kill some Tichorrhines. The Ballerinas dance over the corpses of the Eruption. And the Cannibals find little resistance in Priiiiiiime Tiiiiiiiime

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