We Took a LEAP OF FAITH and Totally NAILED It With This Write-Up

THE PROPHET Division is pulling away from the Lychnobites, who sat in SILENCE in the final minutes of this blowout road loss. Lauren can definitely be LES MISÉRABLES following their third straight loss putting them in the cellar with Vince. RYAN WINS, 53-32

THE MISSION for both teams was to be CROSSING THE LINE for six points. Jason, notching only a safety and a field goal, absolutely failed in that mission. VINCE WINS, 18-5

The Androids were scoring NON-STOP against the home team Wrecking Balls, having TAKEN 3 interceptions to the house in a huge win for the ‘droids. ANDREW WINS, 64-42

THE HAUNTING of the injury to JDIII’s throwing hand in Week Four may have made the veteran a little GUN SHY in overtime, where the Javs managed only a single score against the super high impact defense of the LeScavengers. LeSCOOT WINS, 63-46

THE GREY alternate uniforms for the Minotaurs may have kicked off another uniform curse for the team, after their initial uniform upgrade in Week Two began a four-week skid. The Baboons sink Michael’s BATTLESHIP two weeks in a row. BERKENBILE WINS, 56-42

With the ‘Bous UNDER SUSPICION for rampant performance enhancing drug use since the drug tester was taken hostage by Cari in Week 7, one would have to SUSPECT they aren’t as good as they looked in the early weeks. That’s four losses in their last five games. BRANDON WINS, 56-51

It’s UNKOWN what the hell happened to the BB Cannons this season, but it’s clear their mojo was TAKEN, as they fall to 3-8 on the year following this loss to the Jaws-of-Life. JERRY WINS, 54-24

The potential of the Cutthroats defense came SHINING THROUGH in what is being called FIVE MINUTES IN HEAVEN for the defense that recorded two scoop-and-scores and one pick-six in the final five minutes of the first half. COREY WINS, 44-32

It’s a tale of two teams for the Sausages this year, and you can draw the line from success to failure based on BEFORE AND AFTER playing the DaVena Ballerinas. Since that loss, the Sausages are 1-4, thanks to Joel crushing the Sausages in the payback win here. JOEL WINS, 63-42

The Ballerinas at halftime indicated they needed more heart and to play for a love of the game, after being down 21-3. But ORDINARY LOVE just isn’t good enough. In fact, LOVE ACTUALLY is not all that helpful when the other team is cramming your facemask down your throat. JENNIFER WINS, 45-23

NPL Title Belt Match!

The Cannibals gameplan was to RUN ALL NIGHT against the struggling run defense of the Martians. However, they did not anticipate Miranda’s ENTOURAGE of linebackers to limit the yardage as effectively as they did. In overtime, MIRANDA WINS, 55-52

Someone will need to contact THE NEXT OF KIN for several Labeorphiles players that either died from alcohol poisoning or head trauma – we’re not sure yet. Ethan Ebow, as classy as he is, led the Evil Entities in a PRAYER FOR THE DYING Laci players. ETHAN WINS, 54-0

The Kelly Zeros failed to show, and even if they did show, they may as well have been having BREAKFAST ON PLUTO given how good the Tichorrhines were looking in pregame drills. TRAVIS WINS, 64-0

THE A-TEAM really shined in PRIIIIIME TIIIIIME, taking out the Rock Lobsters. After winning their third straight, the Adam Bombs are in HIGH SPIRITS heading into Week 12. ADAM WINS, 54-32