The Wrecking Balls Continue Their Epic Slide

The Reremice are swimming against the current trying to keep up with the Michael Minotaurs and the surging Berkenbile Baboons in the Prophet Division. They get a big road win here over the Cutthroats to stay in the hunt for the division champ banner. RYAN WINS, 44-23

The Javelineers pull starter Joshtin Stubbert from the game in the 3rd quarter, following three consecutive interceptions. The Androids struggles this season can simply be that they were tuned perfectly to defeat the Javs and no one else. They dominate here. ANDREW WINS, 38-0

The Baboons win their third straight, moving into 2nd place in the division with just three games remaining. They shutout the home Labeorphiles in this one. Thankfully for Laci, the Auspex Division is still a toss-up! BERKENBILE WINS, 20-0

The Minotaurs play well – like they have all season – but they have no answers for the perfect Travis Tichorrhines offensive performance. The Tichorrhines score nine touchdowns in the massive blowout win. TRAVIS WINS, 63-24

The Micropolitans didn’t like their performance on offense, but thankfully the defense was perfect in the shutout over the Miranda Martians. Three weeks remaining on the year and the Mystic Division remains a race between the Samuel Sackbuts and Matt. MATT WINS, 20-0

With the bizarre collapse of the Rachel Wrecking Balls, the Ethan Entities chose the best time of the season to surge for the division title. This win over the also-collapsing JeStErS puts Ethan two games back of the division lead. ETHAN WINS, 27-15

The Sackbuts can’t seem to close the gap on the Matt Micropolitans. They both lost last week. They both win this week. The Sackbuts’ big win here over the falling Wrecking Balls still leaves them one game back. SAMUEL WINS, 20-6

It’s a low scoring affair in this match-up between the Vapulaters and the Zeros. Vince comes away with the W in this one, leaving Kelly treading watter in the Clairvoyant Conference playoff hunt. Vince, on the other hand, needs to win out to stay in the Wild Card race. VINCE WINS, 14-3

The Braggadocios drop their second straight, this one to the Sausages who are playing only to pad their stats for the upcoming contract negotiations for their entire team. That’s right. They scheduled all their contracts to expire after this season. Talk about “win now mode”. STEVEN WINS, 26-15

LeScoot and Joel spill into overtime, with the Juggernauts taking the W in the bonus period. Their second consecutive win puts them at the top of the Oracle Division with the finish line drawing near. JOEL WINS, 18-17

The Cannibals offense hasn’t been able to figure it out this year, lagging well behind the rest of their division. But, they put up a good showing here, gifting the Adam Bombs an ill-timed loss. CHRIS WINS, 37-14

The Killcows look to play spoiler against the Jerry Jaws-of-Life and fail miserably in that endeavor. The J-o-L gladly claim the victory to enter a three way tie for the division banner with the BB Cannons and Rock Lobsters here late in the season. JERRY WINS, 28-6

NPL Title Belt Match!

The NPL Title Belt curse from earlier in the season has ran its course, but it’s still not a lucky charm. The Jellyfish were able to defend it last week against the Brian Bongos, but they get bested by the BB Cannons in this match-up to lose the belt and keep them one week away at least from finally claiming that division championship. BRENT WINS, 29-15

The Rock Lobsters look to win their sixth straight game against one of the NPL’s, erm, ‘kinder’ teams. But it was the Abactors that stole this one away, boiling the lobsters. Did you know that Rock Lobsters scream when they get dominated in football? AXELL WINS, 37-13

The Bous desperately needed to correct course after collecting three L’s in a row. They didn’t get much help from the offense on this one, but were able to get into field goal range with 0:39 left in overtime. That’s all they needed. CARI WINS, 12-9

One rejoined the league in 2020 after ten years in the European circuit. The other joined the league as an expansion team that same year. It’s the Blue Tits and the Bongos in PRIIIIIIIME TIIIIIIIME! The Bongos put up a good fight, but in the end they cannot slay the giants. Bette extends the winning streak to four and improve to 9-2 on the year! BETTE WINS, 27-18