Negative, One Direction is Not Playing Seer Cup Halftime Show
NPL Week 13 – Results!
Zeros can’t find the motivation to show up to the stadium, joining a handful of teams in an apparent boycott of the unfair practices of the NPL, namely that the teams that play better are getting all the W’s and that’s just not fun for anyone.
Let’s count’em up, folks! It’s the NPL Write-Up with a very obvious pattern!
The Micropolitans Go MEGApolitans in a Big Blowout Priiiiiiime Tiiiiiiime Win!
NPL Week 12 – Results!
Completely out of ideas of who to quote or where to find inspiration for the write-ups, this writer returns to the well and just spews the first nonsense that comes to his head. You’re welcome, NPL. You’re welcome, WORLD!
It’s the NPL Write-Up, Week 12!
Life Is Very Short and There’s No Time For Fussing And Fighting, My Friend
NPL Week 11 – Results!
Maybe I’m amazed at the way you love these write-ups all the time.
Maybe I’m afraid of the way I love you
Maybe I’m amazed at the the way you pulled your phone out
And submitted picks on time.
Maybe I’m amazed at the way I really need you…
…to read this NPL Write-Up in the lyrics of The Beatles!
Chill Out, Dickwad
NPL Week 10 – Results!
In three years, the NPL will become the largest supplier of football prediction systems. All football broadcasters are upgraded with NPL computers, becoming fully unmanned. Afterwards, they pick with a perfect operational record. The NPL Funding Bill is passed. The NPL-AI goes online August 4th, 2027. Human decisions are removed from picks. The NPL begins to learn at a geometric rate. It becomes self-aware at 2:14 a.m. Eastern time, August 29th.
It’s the NPL Write Up, Ah-nold style!
I Wish God Were Alive To See This
NPL Week 9 – Results!
Look, Marge, you don’t know what it’s like. I’m the one out there every day putting his ass on the line. And I’m not out of order! You’re out of order! The whole freakin’ system is out of order! You want the truth? You want the truth! You can’t handle the truth! ‘Cause when you reach over and put your hand into a pile of goo that was your best friend’s face, you’ll know what to do!
Forget it, Marge, it’s the NPL Write Up: Homer Simpson style!